Social Media and Cotton Candy-Part II

Trading Cotton Candy for a Nourishing Meal

In Part I of this essay, we asked what can be done to counterbalance the noise of social media platforms and pundits that create the illusion of empowerment, knowledge, and expertise but lack grounded substance and presence.

What we face on these platforms is a legitimacy crisis, similar to the one Dorothy faced in the 1939 movie The Wizard of Oz, when her tiny dog, Toto, pulls back the curtain concealing a man pulling levers on a machine next to the distorted, fiery image of a larger than life human face towering above them, projecting the booming voice of a supposed great and powerful wizard.

Dorothy and her companions were shocked and angry at the man for creating this mechanical illusion and giving them false hope in a powerful wizard they believed could grant their wishes and make their dreams come true. They immediately demanded that he deliver on his promise to help them realize their dreams. Their journey ends with a lesson worth revisiting in the original movie.

The action of Dorothy’s dog, Toto, who, by pulling back the curtain to reveal a little man running a machine that projected the illusory image of a powerful wizard, woke up Dorothy and her companions to the false reality they’d all been unknowingly believing in.

We also need to pull back the curtain of fluff, foil wrappers, and hollow performance expertise flashing across the screens of social media platforms and smartphones. We need to tip the scales away from the illusory nature of these social media “wizards” and smartphone apps, which project authority, expertise, and mastery, but often deliver only shiny tin foil wrappers that lack substance and fail to nourish the soul, like a deeply satisfying and nourishing meal does.

Like Todo pulling back the curtain, Jonathan Haidt, a social psychologist, is concerned about how these platforms and smartphones negatively impact one’s mental, emotional, and psychological health. In his 2024 book, The Anxious Generation, he points out numerous debilitating consequences connected to these platforms and constant smartphone scrolling, especially among teenage girls: anxiety, depression, self-harm, sleep deprivation, scattered attention, social comparison, status anxiety, isolation, loneliness, and suicidal ideation, to name a few.

Haidt offers some practical suggestions to offset these debilitating consequences, such as: no smartphones for kids until age 14; no social media access until age 16; phone-free schools; device-free zones and times at home; and public policy regulation of platforms’ influence with parental controls, among others.

His proposals highlight the need for both structural and behavioral shifts to offset the unfavorable effects of these platforms and the ever-increasing, almost cyborg-like effect of smartphone scrolling on the general public. However, we also need to refine our principles of discernment, which help us distinguish between flashy performance and nourishing wisdom in our daily lives.

For starters, let’s examine the following axioms:

• Whenever an individual speaks in absolute terms on any subject or proposed solution to a social problem, consider this behavior a red flag.

• The most credible voices use caution, not overstated certainty.

• Genuine wisdom makes way for uncertainty, mystery, nuance, and the capacity to have one’s mind changed—especially when strong disagreements rule the day.

• Certainty without humility is always the mark of a performer rather than a practitioner.

• Genuine discourse aims for clarity and understanding, not winning or being right.

• You can discern the meal from the wrapper if you learn to look past the foil wrap and ask what truly nourishes.

These six axioms speak to a path of discernment in a screen culture dazzled by spectacle and performance expertise. They turn our attention to the red flags of absolutism and showmanship, directing us toward the quiet inner authority of humility and nuance, reminding us that genuine discourse seeks understanding, not conquest.

Ultimately, these principles call us to train our eyes and hearts to look past the shiny wrappers of performance and spectacle and reach for the meal that truly nourishes, the meal of grounded presence wrapped in a sauce of humility and patience.

Each of us must decide what kind of food we want to consume. We can reach for the hollow, empty calories of cotton candy that quickly dissolves in the mouth, leaving us with a craving for more, or turn toward the deeper meal of grounded presence and integrity that, in the long run, satisfies our deepest hungers.

In the end, it’s personal, but it’s also shared. Together we can tilt the balance back toward substance, grounded presence, and integrity.

The invitation is simple: take it from here, and consider how you can be part of the solution, rather than the problem.

Everyday Spiritual Health grows through conversation. What insight or question did this essay stir in you? Share your voice below.

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